$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
she trying to cartwheel up the stairs... not going so well
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
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