Having a random hookup so left but love u
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize