I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
Randomize
