i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
What are you wearing tonight?
The colors of the winddddddd
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Randomize
