your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
How could you not be happy? Its like "and then I found 5 dollars" but "and then I found a handle of vodka"
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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