Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
