do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Randomize
