All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
Randomize
