I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
The dog just sneezed and it sounded like a person, after I said bless you I freaked the fuck out and got the gun
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
Randomize