Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
You take a step back sometimes and are like "when was the last time I was sober?" or "wow I need to stop putting everything in my vagina"
Is this an intervention?
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
After we finished, she peed a little on my chest and told me she was "marking her territory". I didn't know if I should have been scared or aroused.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Randomize
