your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
The fact that I pulled something plastic out of my mouth after taking that shot is starting to concern me.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
I was just drinking but now I'm drinking and chasing with red bull. I call this "getting ready for work"
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
I just got CPR certified, don't make me need these skills so soon
Randomize
