never play flip cup with pint glasses
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
