I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
My dad found me naked curled up under a towel on the couch with a fucking tub of butter and a spoon. Ambien Mondays are dead
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
