last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
He decided not to draw dicks on my face when I passed out because he was afraid I'd retaliate and superglue his dick to his stomach....he knows me too well.
At some point we were all eating banana flavored rolling papers.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I fell off my bed and busted open my chin on the prisoner of azkaban. Somehow missed the almost empty Jose handle next to it. So guess what I was doing last night?
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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