Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
I AM VODKA MAN
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
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