Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Sorry my hands just texted you
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Randomize
