I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
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