I wish there was an iPhone app to help you with your shitty personality.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Just scrubbed my teeth for a good twenty minutes. Herpes is afraid of toothpaste, right?
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
I don't think he knows what shame means anymore. He gave some bar slut his sisters Tiffanys necklace, in exchange for anal.
Yes. I am getting trashed on an open tab while judging a karoke competition
Impressive. I approve.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize