thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
God, I missed his penis.
Randomize
