Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
I just keep sniffing it hoping for an explanation.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
They have beer where we have blood.
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I just ran into my psychology professor at Planned Parenthood she asked why I was there and I asked why she was there and it turns out we both had a scare.#bonding because of abortion.
Randomize
