their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Randomize
