My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
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