The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
She sent me a text saying she picked out 17 different Halloween costumes for our kids when they hit the age of 4... The cling factor should have me running right now but honestly I'm just curious
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Randomize