Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
Randomize
