i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
this will be a night to untag.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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