Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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