once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
Randomize
