what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
sometimes i think i'm bisexual but then i realize the only girl i'm attracted to is myself.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
I didn't know that all of his brothers would be hot and musical too. That's a dick move on behalf of biology.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
