i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Randomize
