They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
