Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Don't worry, I'm not gonna try making you Eskimo sisters with your mom
You snapped me at 3am drunk laying on your floor asking if I knew how we couldn't have predicted the housing crisis.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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