just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
we've been doin it since '07. it's like married sex now, were both comfortable so neither of us really tries anymore, we just do it because it's convenient
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Randomize
