I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
What I'm saying is DOWNGRADE. Like, do you see the caps lock?
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
I want a musical about memes.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
