Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
At chipotle, there's a bachelorette party starting out the night here, i'm going to let you imagine what the bride to be looks like
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
