We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
Turns out I tore my ACL when I fell off the mechanical bull.. Happy bday to me
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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