I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
Just ate a whole pizza by myself. Wearing my indian headdress again. its really cool with the french braids. I look like fucking pocahontas or some shit.
It took him an hour to realize I wasn't this "Sarah" girl, and by then he was already crying and eating pizza rolls.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I am going to tweet NASA until they put me into space
Those rocketship riding assholes need the common man
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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