Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
