On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
And now Google thinks I have a hard hat fetish...maybe I do...
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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