Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
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