Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
Dude, I work in two hours. Unless you can find Chris Hemsworth and convince him to have a three-way with us, I'm not getting out of bed.
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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