She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
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