Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
There's a bull to ride and dancing on the bar is encouraged. This is my heaven. And this is why god made leopard tube tops.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
Randomize
