i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
