You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I just barfed on his mom.
You told him you were too drunk to meet his parents. Totally his fault.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
Randomize
