Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
false alarm. still invincible.
I have left a significant number of teethmarks in my prhone. My mouth tastes like tequila and cheddar. Tomorrow already feels fun.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
The worst thing about having to live at your parents again is the struggle to make up more excuses to cover up the booty calls.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I made out with a 40 year old and told her we were dating then got kicked out of a gay bar. This is the day I stop drinking.
Randomize
