Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
And then you guys went on to show us ur sex positions from the before. Thanks
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
