Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
Randomize
