Where did you get a picture of my penis
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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