i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Randomize
