They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
third nipple confirmed
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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